Too Sensitive

I called my friend an irresponsible pet owner and questioned her ability to do anything.

I might have called her ugly and stupid, too.

All I actually said was, “Your kitty’s grown.” She inferred the rest.

A mutual friend said she’s upset that I called her cat “fat.”

I didn’t. She’s just oversensitive.

And apparently, she thinks I don’t know how to communicate. Or that I’m crass.

So, I didn’t grow up in fancy Scarsdale. Or like she says, “SKAAAAARZ-dayle.” Like it’s so important it deserves extra syllables.

What do I care?

She’s stupid anyway. And her cat is fat.

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Illustration by Steve Spetseris